Treehouse of Horror: Naruto style II
by CandyGirl999
Summary: Second instalment of my soon to be NarutoxSimpsons parodies. Naruto, Sasuke, and Sakura eat too much candy on Halloween night and end up having nightmares.
1. The Monkey's Paw

**Treehouse of Horror: Naruto style II**

**A/N: Hey everybody just so you know that thanks to Hildebrant I'm going to be making more Naruto/Simpsons Treehouse of Horror parodies so enjoy.

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Iruka: "Ahem. Hello, everyone. Before the last SimpsonXNaruto Halloween fanfic, I warned you not to read it in case you were sencitive. But you did anyway. Mm. Well, this new fic is even worse. It's scarier, more violent, and I think she snuck in some bad language, too. So please, go to bed early... _(sighs)_ Well, if you didn't listen to me last time, you're not going to now. Enjoy the fanfic."

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It was a dark and chilly Halloween night in Konoha and our very own Team Seven had just finished their trick-or-treat route and were invited to spend the night at Kakashi's house. 

As they stepped inside through the back door (because when they reached the front door it was covered in egg) and turned on the light one could make out their costumes. Naruto was being a shirtless executioner complete with tatered pants, a black head mask with eye holes and a large plastic axe.

Sakura was being a Native American totumpole, who was curently having a hard time keeping her balance seeing as how the costume consisted of three lairs, the first lair was Sakura's main outfit the other two lairs where stacked on top of her head.

And finnally Sasuke was was dressed as the Grim Reaper which concisted of the long black hooded cloke and plastic sythe. Now normally Sasuke wouldn't go trick-or-treating considering the fact that he doesn't like sweets, but Kakashi had promised to teach him a new technique if he went along with it.

Little did Sasuke know was that Kakashi only wanted Sasuke to come trick-or-treating with the team because this year all the senseis had to take their students out for Halloween as a sort of 'fun' D-rank mission and file a report of it and turn it in the following day.

As the kids made their way to the center of the living room to dump out their candy, Sasuke was the first to comment on Sakura's costume.

"Sakura why did you wear that stupid totumpole costume? Even Naruto can tell that its too much of a hassle to travel in."

Sakura blushed at this.

'Sasuke is worrided about me?' Sakura thought that she should reasure her pressious Sasuke that she was alright, not only that but show off her costume to him.

"You've got nothing to worry about Sasuke, you see the totumpoles are conected," she said while unconsiously turning her back to Sasuke. This giving Sasuke a great idea.

"The only thing I have to worry about is falling. You see if I fall then it will be too much of a hassle to get up-"

But at that moment, Sasuke reached out his hand and gave Sakura a slight push which started to send her falling.

"Whoa--wha WHAAAAAAAA!!" screamed Sakura as she fell to the ground, face first, with a loud 'flop'.

"HA HAHA HA HAAHAHA HAHA!!!" Sasuke laughed at his own cruel act/revenge on Sakura.

At that moment Kakashi-sensei arrived inside (who had spent the whole small ordeal cleaning up his front door) and began to hang up is coat.

"Now kids you can have one piece of candy tonight and save the rest for--"

Just as Kakashi turned around he saw the kids currently shoveling candy into their mouths, even Sasuke, (who had just become addicted to the sugery treats after Naruto suffed a marshmellow in his mouth) as if it were going to disappearing.

"If you eat too much you'll have nightmares." said Kakashi in a warning tone of voice.

"Oh yeah, everybody who eats candy is going to have a bad dream tonight, ha!" said Sasuke mockingly while while chewing on a piece of taffy.

"Oh yeah, three bad nightmares!" Sakura said also in sarcassim while eating two candy bars at once.

"I like to see that! Heh heh heh heh heh!" mocked Naruto while opening a pack of gum.

Right at that moment thunder roared from outside, slightly scaring the three kids.

**(Time Jump: Sakura's room)**

Sakura had just finished eating a candy bar when she turned off her light and went to sleep, completly ignoring the candy wrappers on her bed covers.

**(Dream starts)**

Team Seven was sent to the Rain village to complete a mission involving trade agreements. When they had finished they decided to look around the village; only to see that it was nothing but one big poverted market place.

"What a dump! Why would Princess Koyuki live in a place like this?" asked Naruto.

"Naruto, that's Snow country." said Sakura in annoyance.

"Damn!" grunted Naruto.

As they continued to look at the sights they came across a contortionist, who was bending his body in different directions and ended up looking like a pretzel. When he couldn't unbend himself he walked away on his ears.

"I could do that, but I don't wanna." stated Sasuke.

At a market, Naruto began browsing when he saw something very interesting; in a desturbing kind of way. He picked up what looked like the hand of a monkey, but instead of having five fingers it had four.

"Ew! What the heck is this thing?" asked the curiose blond while holding up the hand a distance away from himself. At that moment the shop owner stepped out of the shadows.

"It is a monkey's paw dating back to King Nonocomon, it has the power to grant wishes to it's owner."

"Really? How much?" asked Naruto with interest.

"Sir I must strongly advise you do not perchase this item, for every wish will bring great misfortune. I myself was once Mizukage--"

"Come on pal I don't want to hear your life stories, paw me!" yelled Naruto.

Back in the center of the market, Kakashi was taking a picture of Sasuke and Sakura, who were sitting on top of a camal. When he turned around he saw Naruto coming towards him carrying the monkey's paw. He looked at it in disgust.

"Ew, Naruto, where did you get that ugly thing?"

"Why, at that little shop right over..." When Naruto turned to point out the shop, all that was there was a gust of wind.

"...there." Naruto gasped. But when he turned around he noticed that he looked the wrong way; and that the shop was on the left side.

"Oh, no, wait it was over there." he said while pointing to the correct direction. The shop keeper was waving at him.

"You'll be sari!" he cried out.

Back in Konoha Team Seven was having a meeting in there usual training spot; trying to figure out what to do with the paw. The team was sitting in a circle on the grass with the paw in the center.

"What should we do with it?" asked Sasuke while staring at it.

"I think we should wish for world peace!" stated Sakura.

"Forget it Sakura! It's my paw so I get to decide what to wish for!" said Naruto.

"Naruto, theres something I don't like about that severed hand." said Kakashi rather nervously.

"Oh stop being so nervous sensei! That monky's paw is gonna make our dreams come true!" replied Naruto reasuringly.

While Naruto and Kakashi were talking, nether of them noticed Sasuke reaching for the paw. The Uchiha avenger stared at it for a moment before lowering his face to it and began whispering his wish. When he finished, the pinky finger of the paw went down; indecating that the wish was granted. This image is what Team Seven saw when they turned around.

"Oh no, Sasuke made a wish!" exclaimed Sakura.

"What?! What did you wish for?!" asked Naruto, who was both surprised and pived that Sasuke beat him to the first wish.

"You'll see." said Sasuke with a smirk plastered on his fase.

Five seconds passed before the team got there answer.

"EXTRA EXTRA READ ALL ABOUT IT! ITACHI UCHIHA WAS FOUND DEAD IN THE FOREST OF DEATH TODAY! READ ALL ABOUT IT!" came the cry of the paper boy, who was running around the training grounds.

All of Team Seven was staring at Sasuke in disbelif.

"You didn't." said Kakashi in shock.

"I did." replied Sasuke with that same smirk. "This paw has served it's purpose, I don't need it anymore." With that said Sasuke tossed the paw to the grownd. Naruto reached down and grabbed it in frustrasion.

"Okay, no more fooling around! Paw, this is Naruto Uzumaki! I wish for Team Seven to be rich and famous!" he stated.

"Now your using you're head for once dobe." stated Sasuke.

The insult went unnoticed for Naruto was too busy watching the second finger on the paw go down, the next thing Team Seven knew they were surrounded by piles of money.

"YAY!!" cried the two happy boys when they noticed themselves covered in money.

"WOOHOO!" cried Kakashi in delight as his wallet began to over fill with the green delight.

"Look guys! My purse exploded!" exclaimed Sakura while holding a butt load of money in her arms.

"Come on team, we're going to the fanciest restaurant in the village!" exclaimed Kakashi throwing the bills in the air.

The team made their way to The Golden Pearl, Konoha's most fanciest and by far expencive restaurant.

"I'm sorry but we have no tables left for you're kind of social status." said the maitre d' as he turned away a family. As he turned around he noticed Team Seven walking towards him. He gasped in shock.

"Team Seven! Right this way please." he said as he lead them to their're table.

"Naruto, maybe fame and fourtune aren't as bad as they say." said Sakura in saticfaction. Unfortunatly for them, there was a group of people who didn't take to kindly to the famous team.

"If I hear one more thing about Team Seven, I swear, I'm going to scream." said a women from a higher social statuse.

"At first they were cute and funny, but now there just annoying." said a woman to the first woman and her husband.

The sentiment is echoed around the village as our Favorite Ninja Squad becomes heavily merchandised.

"Eighteen bucks for this?! What a rip off!" exclaimed an angry department store costomer as he threw away a Naruto T-shirt with said ninja on it saying "Belive It!"

--

At a record store a new CD was launched featuring Sasuke and Sakura. One of the songs being sung as a sample was 'Bring Me To Life'

Sasuke: "Wake me up!"

Sakura: "Wake me up inside!"

Sasuke: "I can't wake up!"

Sakura: "Wake me up inside!"

Sasuke: "Save me!"

Sakura: "Call my name and save me from the dark!"

"Man this thing is really getting out of hand!" complained a costomer.

--

Outside there was a bill board advertising for mamograms. On the cover was Naruto along side a doctor who was saying "Get a Mamogram! Belive It!"

"Is there anything they won't do?!" complained a woman who saw the bill board.

--

The next day, back in Team Seven's usual training ground the team became fully aware of the way the villagers were glaring at them.

"Naruto this is terrible." stated Kakashi.

"Come to think of it, the guy that sold me this thing did say the wishes would bring grave misfortune. I thought he was just being colorful." said Naruto cluelessly.

Sakura then picked up the paw.

"I wish for world peace." she said and the thumb of the paw went down.

"Sakura, that was very selfish of you!" Sasuke yelled in her face.

--

At a conference in Konoha, the Leaf Village and the Cloud Village where having a discusion.

"Sorry about trying to kidnap the Hyuuga heiress." said the Cloud Village representative.

"Oh don't worry, it was probably their fault for not going to the ceremony" replied the Leaf Village representative while pulling the Cloud representative into a brotherly hug.

Through out the five countries, weapons are being destroyed and changes are being made. For example the building were countries have their conferences was being turned into a mall. Children were begining to plant trees and floweres. One girl even changed the sign from 'DANGER' to 'GARDEN'.

All five contries joined hands, froming a giant peace sign across the contries and began singing

_Come along people now _

_Smile on your brother_

_Everybody get together_

_Try to love one another right now_

--

As the five contries contined in their brotherly bondage they were being watched by an unknow horror.

"Foolish humans." said the first alien from the space ship hovering over the earth to his partner.

"Oh yes Cronus, and now earth is right for the taking." said the other alien while rubbing his hands together. Both aliens broke into laughter.

"MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA"

--

The mother ship containing the aliens lands in the village square. The two aliens come out wilding a slingshot and a club.

"People of earth! We come to you in the spirit of hostility and menace!" anounced Cronus while flexing his slingshot.

"Now lets be reasonable," said the Third Hokage while aproching the aliens. "We can resolve our differences peacefully."

Jorell silenced him by bonking him on the head with the club.

BONK

"Ouch!"

"Your superior intellect is no match for our puny weapons!" said Cronus as two more ships landed in the village.

"They're conking us with a club! Wished we saved an katana or two." said Izumo.

"Move along humans!" said Jorell as he and Cronus as they marched a group of ninjas into town.

"This is all Team Seven's fault!" exclaimed a women in anger.

"Before I was just board with their antics and their merchandise, now I wish they were dead." said a man menacingly.

--

The next day Team Seven was having their daily meeting in their usual training ground. Sasuke was reading the newspaper; the article read "Aliens inslave human race!"

"Jeezs now were're slaves! This paw sucks!" cried Sasuke in anger.

"You didn't think it was so sucky when you used it to kill your brother!" exclaimed Sakura, upset at the fact that her wish didn't turn out right.

"Yeah but know I have to worry about the alien fan girls stalking me." as if on cue a group of teenage girl aliens were standing ten feet away from the training grounds, making kissy faces at Sasuke.

"Theres one more wish left, here Kakashi sensei you take it." said Naruto holding up the paw to said man. Kakashi stepped back and put his hands up in defence.

"Oh no Naruto, I don't want it. That paw has caused nothing but trouble!"

"Fine, then I'll make the last wish. I wish I know that can't backfire." Naruto lifts the paw up so it leveled with his head.

"I wish for a bowl of miso ramen, with peas, carrots, and chesse, and, and I don't want any zombie ramen, I don't want to turn into ramen myself, and I don't want any weird surprises. You got it?"

The monkey's paw closes it's finger in understanding as a bowl of ramen materializes.

"Hey!" exclaims Naruto as he makes a grab at the bowl and starts eating it.

"Not bad. Nice, hot peas. Good broth. The noddles are a little dry--" Naruto freezes in realization.

"The noddles are a little dry! Naruto lifts the paw over his head and begins cursing it. "Oh, foe, the cursed teeth! What demon from the depths of hell created thee!"

"Give me that!" shouted Kakashi as he snatched the paw away from Naruto and begins walking away.

"Where are you going sensei?" asked Sakura.

"I'm throwing this paw out!" exclaimed Kakashi as he continued to walk away.

--

As Kakashi made his way into the village square he began to throw the paw into the local dumpster, that is until Guy came passing by.

"Hello Kakashi my eternal rival slash fellow slave!" Guy took notice of the paw in Kakashi's hand.

"Hey is that once of those monkey's paw thing that lets you wish for stuff?" he asked.

"Yeah, but I gotta warn you this thing brings--" at that moment Kakashi got an evil thougth in his head, smiling an evil smile from behind his mask.

"I mean yes. Why don't you give it a shot? Heh heh." said Kakashi as he handed the paw to Guy. Guy took the paw oblivious to Kakashi's obvious decite. As soon as Guy took the paw all the fingers went up; indication of a new owner.

"Oh would you look at that!" exclaimed Guy in amazment. At that moment the two men heard a distant scream.

"AAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!" screamed Kotetsu as he ran away from Cronus the alien.

"Kneel before my slingshot puny earthling!" yelled Cronus flinging small rocks at the helpless ninja. Guy turned back to the paw.

"Well, I guess my first wish is to get rid of those awful aliens." the pinky finger goes down indicating the wish has been granted. Almost immidiantly Cronus began running away in fear.

"AAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!! HE'S GOT A BOARD WITH A NAIL IN IT!!" screamed Cronus while running away from his previous prey.

"INSLAVE HUMANITY WILL YAH!!" screamed Kotetsu as he chased Cronus, whilding said board with a nail over his head.

"Run Cronus!" cried Jorell as he and Cronus made their way to there ship and took off, the other ships following them.

"Well Jorell, it seems the earthling have won." said Cronus in defeat. Jorell began to go into a pusdo speech.

"Did they? That board with a nail may have defeated us. But the humans won't stop there. They'll make bigger boards and bigger nails, soon they will make a board with a nails so big, it will distroy them all!"

"MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!"

--

Back on earth the villagers cheer and carry Guy on their sholders, the females toss flowers all around.

"Hey Kakashi, this little thing a mijiger really works great!" exclaimed Guy in pure bliss as the villagers put him down and makes his way towards his house.

"Now that I have saved the world maybe I'll fix up the house!" with that said Guy goes inside and before everybodies eyes it changes into a giant castle.

Poor Kakashi had his arms crossed over his chest and grumbled.

"I wish I had a monkey's paw..."

_(Dream ends)_


	2. The Naruto Zone

**Treehouse of Horror: Naruto style II**

**A/N: I don't own Naruto or the Simpsons Treehouse of Horror.**

**Naruto belongs to Masashi Kishimoto**

**The Simpsons belongs to Matt Groening

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"Naruto...Naruto." whispered Sakura as she gently shook Naruto out of his sleep. After she had woken up form her horrible nightmare Sakura felt shaken, and although she hated to admit it, thinking that it makes her look like a little kid, she desperately wanted to sleep with someone.

Her first chose was Sasuke, but she knew that if she ever asked him he would turn her away and she was way too tired and scared to argue. And of course she didn't feel comfortable with sleeping with Kakashi sensei (since he's a grown man and she was just a little girl) so her only other chose was Naruto.

Naurto began to stir. When he turned around and opened his eyes he saw Sakura standing by his bed side, looking disturbed.

"Sakura? W-what's wrong?" he asked groggily.

"I had a bad dream. Can I sleep in you're bed?" she asked; the pled obvious in her eyes. Naruto looked slightly irritated.

"Oh come on Sakura..." he begged in a groggily tone, he was way too tired for this. But Sakura had a backup plan.

She pulled out what looked like a colorful necklace out of her pajama pocket.

"I'll give you a candy necklace." she said, hoping it would work; one microsecond later she got her answer.

Naruto snatched the candy necklace out of her hand and shoved the whole thing down his mouth and began chewing it. When he was finished he took out the string and threw it on the floor.

"Climb aboard." he said and Sakura got into bed next to him.

"Thanks Naruto." she said with a smile.

"Less talk more sleep." was Naruto's reply before he drifted of to sleep; the last thing he saw was the moon out the window

_(Dream starts)_

_Presented for your consideration: Konohagakure an average little village, with a not-so-average monster._

In the village square, the villagers were wondering around with nervous toothy smiles saying "Happy thoughts, happy thoughts!"

_The people of Konohagakure have to think happy thoughts and say happy things. Because this particular monster can read minds, and if displeased, can turn people into grotesque walking terrors._

Walking by the village was Lord Homura, one of the council members of Konohagakure who was trying his hardest to smile and think happy thoughts.

"Happy thoughts, happy thoughts," he repeated, but just couldn't keep it up.

"Boy I'm getting mighty sick of this!" but as soon as those words were said his body promptly turned into that of a dog, retaining his human head.

"Ruff ruff ruff, bow wow." he barked while strolling away.

Some where on the opposite side of the village, Team Seven was having a little morning get together at the local cafe. At that moment Naruto walked into the cafe with an innocent smile on his face.

_And did I mention to you the monster is a twelve-year-old boy? Quite a twist huh? Bet you didn't see that one coming._

"Good morning!" piped Naruto cheerfully. Everybody at the table spat out whatever they were eating or drinking.

"Morning!" piped Sakura with a large nervous smile forced on her face.

"Good morning Naruto!" greeted Kakashi while pulling down his mask (because of Naruto being the way he is, wouldn't allow him to wear it anymore) to show Naruto his equally large nervous forced smile. Naruto made his way to the table to pour himself some chocolate cereal.

"Hiya Naruto! How's my best friend?" asked Sasuke with a large nervous smile on his face while giving Naruto a brotherly hug.

"Aww thanks Sasuke." replied Naruto as he returned the embrace. As he was about to eat his cereal he saw the cat that belonged to the owner of the cafe rubbing up against his leg, purring.

"Every day, same old cat. I'll make it more interesting." with that said, Naruto furrowed his brow, turning the cat into a multi-colored fire-breathing whatever.

The cat lets out a loud meow as its fire breath singes the table the team was sitting at; setting the cereal box on fire and scaring everybody.

"Ah, there. That's better." said Naruto with satisfaction in his voice.

"Much better," replied Kakashi with a nervous smile. "Oh, good! The curtains are on fire."

Kakashi ran to the curtains to put them out the near by fire extinguisher.

"It's good that you made that...awful thing, Naruto. It's really good." said Sasuke nervously with that same forced smile.

"Kids don't you think you should head down to the Academy? I think Iruka as the answers to yesterday's history test posted." said Kakashi, still putting out the burning curtains.

"Okay!" replied Naruto cheerfully as he Sasuke and Sakura made their way out of the cafe.

"I knew it! I knew Yondime should have never sealed that fox demon inside him!" Kakashi said to himself while putting out he last of the fire.

--

Naruto, Sasuke, and Sakura make there way inside the school bus. When on there they could see all the children bunched up in the back.

"Hi guys!" greeted Naruto cheerfully. The only response he got was Ino screaming her head of and running further to the back of the bus.

Naruto made his way towards the driver of the bus; who turned out to be Genma.

"Hey Genma sensei move over I'm driving!" said Naruto with that same smile.

"No can do little man, you see there's a rule that--" Genma stopped short as he saw Naruto's confused innocent look on his face and then he realized.

"Oh wait; you're the dude with those freaky powers right?"

The next thing they knew the bus was careening down the road with Naruto at the wheel, as the kids on the bus scream in panic. Genma was on the floor manning the pedals.

"Quite riding the break, Genma. Give it some gas man!" ordered Naruto.

"Hey this is fun isn't it?! We're gonna die aren't we?! Heh heh heh heh heh!!!" laughed Genma madly.

The bus whizzes passed Izumo and Kotetsu who were walking down the sidewalk.

"Hiya, Naruto!" they greeted with large smiles while waving at the speeding bus.

At the Academy, the over turned bus was 'parked' in front.

(Inside)

"Well, everyone the history of our village has been changed to correspond with Naruto's answers on yesterday's exam." stated Iruka, getting groans out of all the students. Iruka began reading out the answers

"Konoha was now discovered in 1942 by..." Iruka consults. "'Some long haired guy'. And our country isn't called Fire Country anymore. It's...Believe It Land".

Naruto giggles at Iruka's statement.

Over the P.A. system, Mizuki makes an announcement.

_"Attention all students! Naruto Uzumaki this ones for you!"_

The tune of a harmonica could be herd as Mizuki broke into song.

_"Hello my baby, hello my honey, hello my rack time gal! Send me your kisses my wire, maybe my hearts on fire!"_

Meanwhile, Naruto sits on his throne, attended to by Ino and Hinata. Ino was giving him sips of a chocolate shake and Hinata was fanning him with a large feather (inwardly enjoying fanning her crush) He asks Iruka to bring him the phone as he makes a quick call.

--

At Ichirakus Ramen shop everybody who was eating lunch was repeating the phrase "Happy thoughts, happy thoughts."

Teuchi hears the telephone ringing and picks it up.

"Hello, Ichiraku's...Hold on let me check." He turns to everybody in the restaurant. "Uh, hey, everybody! I'm a stupid moron with an ugly face and a big butt and my butt smells and I like to kiss my own butt."

Everybody in the restaurant burst out laughing.

"Ho ho, that's a good one!" laughed some random guy.

"Wait a minute..." said Teuchi suspiciously as he picked up the receiver.

--

Back at the Academy, Naruto hangs up the phone and starts laughing. Iruka forced a laugh while holding the phone.

_"One more time!" _came Mizuki's voice over the P.A. system as he broke into song again.

_"Hello my baby, hello my honey, hello my rack time gal!"_

Ino gives Naruto another sip of his chocolate shake.

"I love school." declares Naruto with a smile on his face.

Back into the cafe the owner's cat (who was still a grotesque multi-colored fire breathing whatever) meows in its sleep while accidentally singeing Pakun in the butt, who was lying nearby.

"YAOW!!" screamed Pakun while vanishing into a puff of smoke.

"Come on, make it, make it, make it, please, please, please!!" begged Sasuke as he and Sakura watched a football game on the television.

Naruto made his way into the cafe, and looked at the football game in disgust.

"I wanna watch the Simpsons!" demanded the blond. But Sasuke didn't seem to listen.

"Shut up dobe! If they make this field goal I win fifty bucks!"

Angered, Naruto looks at Sasuke with furrowed brows, and poof! The raven vanished.

Sakura looked around the room (frightened) looking for her beloved. Naruto ploped himself down on the floor to see the result of the field goal kick on TV, listening to the announcer call the play.

_"The kick is up! It's looking good! The ball is turning into a raven haired emo kid!"_

"AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" screamed Sasuke as he collided with the goal post, and falls to the ground.

_"And it's no good! And you know what we say every time something strange happens! It's good that Naruto did that! It's very good!_

Naruto smiles at this as he changes the channel to FOX.

Outside the cafe footsteps could be heard as the silhouette of a boy appears behind the curtains. The door to the cafe opens and there stood Sasuke with his head wrapped up on bandages and a sickly smile on his face. The other two kids didn't notice him entering as he quietly approached Naruto.

_'Slowly, slowly don't make a sound don't even think because he can hear you're thoughts. And when he's least expecting it bash his head into the chair; end of monster...' _after stupidly thinking all this, Sasuke raised a chair over his head ready to bash it against Naruto's head; killing him.

Naruto; hearing Sasuke's thoughts raises his finger and points it at Sasuke without taking his eyes off the TV.

In just one second Sasuke turned into a jack-in-the-box, complete with jester hat and all.

"AAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!" screams Sasuke at what he has become.

Kakashi made his way into the cafe and was taken aback at the sight before him.

"Naruto!" he gasped in fear and in anger.

"Sakura did it." said Naruto cockily. Kakashi had had enough as he walked up behind Naruto.

"That's it young man your coming with me!" he demanded but was silenced by Naruto's furrowed brows.

"Please..." he begged with a forced nervous smile.

--

Ten minutes later the team made their way into Dr. Akira Imoto's office; who was an expert in child psychology.

"You like attention, don't you Naruto?" Dr. Imoto asked the blond who was sitting on a couch. Naruto smiled.

"Do I ever! Heh heh heh!"

"Well we all do," interjected Dr. Imoto with a satisfied smile; they were making progress.

"The only problem is that you don't care if you get good attention; say getting the highest grades in school. Or bad attention, say turning your teammate into a jack-in-the-box."

At this Dr. Imoto turned his attention to Sasuke, who was sitting in between Kakashi and Sakura nodding his springy head back and forth.

"Sasuke I see you agree with me." said Dr. Imoto.

"I'm not nodding it's the air conditioner." replied Sasuke annoyed.

"Well that's too bad, because the attention the boy craves should be coming from you," said Dr Imoto while putting his hand on a surprised Naruto's shoulder.

"I want you to spend some time with the boy. Get to know him. Be his best friend."

--

Just as the doctor said Naruto and Sasuke started spending time together (Sasuke was still a jack-in-the-box). They went to ball games, went fishing, shot cans off the fence with BB guns, went to the temple to pray, and have gone on rollercoaster's at amusement parks. And through out all of this they ended up being closer then they ever thought they could get. Almost as if they were brothers.

At the end of the week the two boys were getting ready for a sleep over. Sasuke was trying to tuck Naruto in but was having a hard time since he was still a jack-in-the-box so he had to do it with his teeth.

When he finally managed Naruto thanked him.

"Good night Naruto." said Sasuke with a smile.

"Good night Sasuke," replied Naruto as he put his hands behind his head. "You know these last few days have been really swell. I wish there was something I could do to make it up to you."

Sasuke looked down shyly.

"Well...if you wanted to you could give me my body back..." Naruto sat up.

"You got it." with that Naruto stared at Sasuke; not with furrowed brows but with a warm smile on his face and eyes. With a loud POP, Sasuke was back to normal.

Sasuke in astonishment looked over his body to make sure everything was were it should be. Satisfied he pulled Naruto into a brotherly hug.

"Thanks dobe." he said.

"I love you Sasuke." said Naruto as he returned the hug.

"I love you too Naruto." with that Sasuke lend in and kissed Naruto on the forehead.

_(Dream ends)_

Poor Naruto woke up screaming his head off.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!"


	3. If I Only Had Power

**Treehouse of Horror: Naruto style II**

**A/N: I don't own Naruto or the Simpsons Treehouse of Horror.**

**Happy Birthday Naruto!

* * *

**

Sasuke was peacefully sleeping in his bed until he was woken up by two voices; belonging to his teammates.

"SASUKE! SASUKE!" cried Naruto and Sakura as they jumped into bed with Sasuke. The raven woke with a jolt.

"What?! What's going on?!" he asked startled by his teams behavior.

"We both had nightmares." said Naruto as he popped his head from under the covers.

"Can we sleep with you? Please!" begged Sakura since neither she or Naruto wanted to sleep with Kakashi (just imagine what he could to in his sleep if his dreams are as perverted as he is).

Sasuke groaned, he was way too tired to argue.

"You both toilet trained?" he asked groggily.

"Yes!" replied the two offended genins.

"Oh alright," agreed the tired raven as he looked at his alarm clock.

"Four o'clock!" he stated with alarm as he rested his head back on his pillow.

"In a couple of hours I have to get up and train to get stronger...gottan get stronger...get stronger..." with that Sasuke nods off to sleep.

_(Dream Starts)_

Team Seven was at their usual training grounds. Kakashi was teaching them how to break an enemy's neck with just one kick; of course it involved using ALOT of chakra. This was a powerful jutsu and Kakashi made them promise not to use it unless their lives depended on it. They had been practicing with wooden dummies.

Sakura had no problem with this jutsu since she as perfect chakra control, but the only thing she lacks is physical strength.

Naruto had no problem with physical strength at all, the only thing he lacked was chakra control (but he shouldn't have to worry since he always finds a way to come out on top).

Sasuke had both good chakra control and physical strength; the only problem with him (and the other two) was they had to keep it at a certain amount to break the bone. Too little and you will only succeed in cracking it, two much and you could end up hurting yourself (not to mention make the head fly off).

Sasuke sat on the ground breathing hard and nursing his (very) bruised leg.

"Why can't I get the hang of this?" Sasuke asked angrily to himself. He would never succeed in killing Itachi if he didn't master this jutsu.

"Sasuke this takes time to master, you can't just expect to learn it all in one try." said Kakashi in an attempt to comfort his prised student, but Sasuke didn't take the attempt to comfort him very well.

"Thats not good enough! If I'm going to kill Itachi I have to gain enougth power to do so, my flesh is too weak I need to get stronger no matter what!" Sasuke stands up and brushes dust off of himself.

"I'm going to go find a solo mission." he said as he walked off. Kakashi stared back at him.

"Perhaps this would be a good time to call it a day."

Back in the Sound Village, Orochimaru was having a bit of a problem himself.

It seems that ALL of his ninjas were nothing but weak wannabes that only wanted to get on his good side to be recognized. Thankfully he found a solution to the problem long ago.

"Kabuto come down to the laboratory with me, and bring the oil lamp." ordered Orochimaru as he pulled the switch on his fire place sending both him and Kabuto (who was following him with the lamp) into dungeon like place. As they made their way down the steps Orochimaru began to talk.

"You know Kabuto, I have always dispised the lazyness of the common shinobi. The spirit is strong but the flesh is too weak, so I replaced the flesh; which is weak with steel which is strong." while saying all of this Orochimaru made his way to a covered object.

"Behold! The greatest breakthrough in labor relations since the cat o' nine tails!" Orochimaru pulls down the covers unveiling his Frankenstein monster; a giant robotic ninja.

Kabuto looks at the creation with astonishment.

"How long before it's ready my lord?"

"Keep your pants on, Kabuto! All we are missing is...a human brain." Orochimaru smiles menacingly at this thought.

Back in Konoha, Team Seven was in the Hokage's office looking for a solo (low rank) mission that Sasuke could do.

"Hey, here's a good mission, Sasuke!" said Sakura, but paused as she read the scroll carfully.

"Oh, wait, you have to know how to operate an ultrasonic lithotriptor."

"How hard can that be?" asked Sasuke, but Saskura shook her head indicating not to take the mission.

"Hey Sasuke, here's one!" said Naruto as he took the scroll from Sakura. "Twenty-eight dollors any hour, plenty of freash air, and you get to meet lots of interesting people." Sasuke became fasinated by this.

"What mission is that?" Naruto smiled evilly.

"Grave digger. MUHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!!!!"

The next day Sasuke found himself digging a grave.

_'How did I ever let the dobe talk me into this?' _thought Sasuke as he continued to dig and listen to the head grave digger shout orders at him.

"Dipper, widder, faster! I wouldn't burry my turtle in that mud puddle-ACK what's the use." complained the head grave digger as he left Sasuke to himself.

"Jeez what a slave driver." complained Sasuke. Feeling a little light headed, Sasuke puts down the shovel and takes a nap in the grave.

--

That evening, Orochimaru and Kabuto pay a visit to the Konoha cemetery in search of a brain; because everybody knows that Konoha's ninjas posses the will of fire.

"What corpse should we un-earth my lord?" asked Kabuto,holding the shovel while Orochimaru holds the oil lamp.

"I don't know yet Kabuto, I feel like a kid in a candy store." as they talked they stumbled upon a grave; Sasuke's grave. The two Sound ninjas take a look at it.

"Well what do you know an open grave. Kabuto, get him out quickly. The stench is over powering." said Orochimaru as he covered his nose with a handkerchief. Kabuto takes a closer look at the 'corpse'.

"Wait Lord Orochimaru, that's Sasuke Uchiha. Dosn't he already have your mark?" asked Kabuto.

"Well whom else did you have...in mind?" asked Orochimaru sinisterly as he pictures Kabuto's brain floating in mid air.

Kabuto starts getting very uncomfortable.

"Uh, Uchiha will do just fine, my lord!" inquired Kabuto trying to get Orochimaru to change his mind.

--

As they drag Sasuke away in a bag, he wakes up and struggles.

"My lord did you hear that?" asked Kabuto as he heard Sasuke's muffled voice.

"No, I didn't. Who is it? Frankenstein? The Booooger Man?" Orochimaru asked, sarcasm obvious in his voice.

"It's the boy in the bag, my lord. I think he's alive.

"Oh." says Orochimaru as he walked over to the bag and began whacking it with the shovel.

"Bad corpe!"

TWACK!

"Bad corpe!"

TWACK!

"Stop--"

TWACK!

"scaring--"

TWACK!

"Kabuto!"

TWACK!

Sasuke is knocked unconscious and the muffling stops.

"Is that better?" asked Orochimaru.

"Thank you my lord." replied Kabuto as he took the bag and continued walking.

--

In the lab back in Sound, Orochimaru began performing brain surgery on the Uchiha avenger.

Orochimaru saws the top off of Sasuke's head.

"Kabuto hand me that ice cream scoop."

"Ice cream scoop?" asked Kabuto.

"Dammit, Kabuto, this isn't rocket science, it's brain surgery!" Kabuto hands Orochimaru the ice cream scoop.

Orochimaru scoops out Sasuke's brain out of it's protective nerves and plucks the whole thing out with his hands. He stares at it in fascination.

"Hello." he says as he puts it on top of his own head.

"Look at me! I'm Davey Crockett!" he giggled

--

They install the brain in the robot, then eat some pepperoni pizza, then power it up (with your standard horror movie Big Switch, accompanied by lightening and sparks.

As Orochimaru glanced at the robot he saw it's hand twitch. Orochimaru becomes overly joyed by this.

"Look Kabuto! It's moving! It's alive! Oh, that fellow at Radio Shack said I was mad. Well, who's mad now! MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!"

Orochimaru bends over to look his creation right in the eyes.

"Hi there, I'm your daddy."

The robot gets up and begins to examine his hands and began to speak (in Sasuke's voice).

**"I'm...I'm made of steel..."**

After taking all this in Sasuke was suddenly hit with realization.

**"I...have...POWER! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!" **the robot (Sasuke) activated his X-ray/Navigation vision and spotted Itachi Uchiha thousands of miles away. The robot (Sasuke) chuckled evilly, stood up and began making his way towards his destination.

**"Itaaaaachi...come out and plaaaaaaay..."**

"How delightful! Alive for only two minutes and he has already found a target." said Orochimaru, proud of his creations killing intent.

--

Back in Konoha Team Seven was having a night meeting at Kakashi's house. Naruto and Sakura were watching Johnny Carson (who was dressed as Karnak).

_"Geraldo Rivera, Madonna, and a diseased yak."_

Ed McMahon could be heard laughing

_"Ho ho ho ho!"_

Kakashi walked passed the kids to look out the window.

"Sensei, what's wrong?" asked Sakura.

"It's Sasuke. He's missing." replied Kakashi with worry.

"Sasuke missing? Get outta here." said Naruto in disbelife

"He hasn't showed up for meetings in two days." replied Kakashi matter-of-factly.

"What do you know. He's right." replied Sakura, looking at Naruto.

--

Back in Sound, things weren't going so smoothly for Orochimaru.

Orochimaru was sitting on his knees, crying.

"It wasn't suppose to be this way...It was suppose to be a thing of beauty. Not this abomination!" as he said this, the robot (Sasuke) was sitting in a chair with his feet propped on top of the table, swinging Itachi's spine; which still had his head on it.

Sure he succeeded in killing someone. But the problem is that he wouldn't do a thing Orochimaru said. All he did was spin his brothers head around and eat rice balls. Seeing as he had already fulfilled his purpose in life he didn't have to lift a finger anymore.

Orochimaru grabs onto the front of Kabuto's shirt.

"Oh Kabuto I was wrong to play God. Life is precious, not a thing to be toyed with. Now take out that brain and flush it down the toilet!"

"My lord his friends might appreciate it if you returned the brain to it's owner." Kabuto suggested.

"Oh come on, it's 11:45!" complained Orochimaru, but one look at Kabuto's puppy dog eyes said so other wise.

"Oh, Kabuto when you look at me with those puppy dog eyes...Oh alright!"

--

As Orochimaru sawed the brain back in Sasuke's head he heard Sasuke muttering.

STITCH

"Ow."

STITCH

"Ow."

STITCH

"Ow."

STITCH

"Ow."

"Oh, will you quite you're complaining!" said Orochimaru in annoyance.

"Lord Orochimaru do you know what this means? He is alive!" stated Kabuto.

"Oh, you're right, Kabuto. I guess I owe you a coke." Orochimaru then turned his attention to his failed experiment.

"And as for you, you clinking, clattering cacophany of colligenous cog and camshifs, take that!" with that Orochimaru gives the robot a swift kick in the leg and walks away.

But to Orochimaru's dismay the robot begins to topple over.

"RUN MY LORD!" screamed Kabuto. But it was too late the robot fell on top of Orochimaru, trapping him. Kabuto ran towards his master, only to see his head sticking out.

"Every bone...shattered, organs...leaking vital fluids...a slight headache...loss of appetite. Kabuto, I'm going to die."

"My lord, is there nothing I can do?" asked Kabuto, desperate to save his master.

"Well...perhaps there is. Kabuto go to my office...on the third drawer to the left are...surgical tools, and some ether...

_(Dream ends)_

Sasuke woke up screaming.

"AAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!"

"Did you have a nightmare, Sasuke?" asked Sakura worried.

"No, Naruto bit me!" cried Sasuke pulling his left arm up, rubbing the sore spot. Said blond stuck his head out from under the covers.

"Hey man you were crushing me! I tried to scream but my mouth was full of flesh."

"I'm gonna go to the bathroom." stated Sasuke as he got out of bed to make his way to said destination.

When Sasuke made his way to the bathroom and looked in the mirror he was horrofied to see Orochimaru's head sewed on his right shoulder.

"AAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!!" screamed Sasuke.

"Perhaps you are wondering why I have two heads," Orochimaru spoke.

"Well, my body was crushed, so I had my head grafted onto your, shall we say, skelital frame.

Sasuke tried to stay calm.

"I can wake up. It's all a dream. It's just a dream!" Orochimaru smiles sinisterly.

"Oh, that's right. It's all a dream...Or is it? MUHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!!!!!!!"

**Next week, on 'Naruto'...**

Team Seven was sitting at the breakfast table while Kakashi cooked breakfast. Sakura makes an announcement.

"Don't for get, Sasuke, next week at the Culture festival, there having their annual rice ball sale."

"Mmmm...rice balls." hummed Sasuke with bliss on his face. He still had Orochimaru's head attached to his shoulder.

"But Sasuke, next week I have a meeting with the Sound Four to discuss taking over Konoha!" inquired Orochimaru. Sasuke didn't look too happy about this.

"This is exactly why I hate sweets!"


End file.
